McDonald's Customer Calls 911 Because of Extra Sauce Charge
After They Find Him, They Plan On Looking For Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny, and a Sane Woman
You Sure That's a Leg? Maybe It's John Holmes Reincarnated!
REALLY Good Cookies, or Those Wacky Pakistanis Part II
Usually It's Women Who Win These Kinds Of Cases
Those Pakistanis Sure Know How To Have Fun With Kites
Now If We Can Just Get This To Work For Marijuana Brownies...
What Size Coke? Small, Medium, Large, Or 8-Ball?
Another "Mother Of the Year" Candidate
Just Your Basic Domestic Squabble...
I've Heard of WORSE Sentences...
Brother Shoots Brother Over a Beer
More Reasons Why I Can't Wait For The World To End So I Can Get Away From People Like This
Bigamist Caught Through Wedding Announcement
You Think YOUR Neighbor Stinks?
OK, Don't Brag About Your Marijuana Plant To Strangers... Lesson For The Day
7-Year Old Sets 4-Year Old Brother On Fire
Dude, It's Not Like Canada Has A Lot To Brag About, Let Bell Have It
Bottle of Crown Royal Does In Thief
Mom Offers Snacks For Kids To Beat Up Schoolmate
Must Be Related To The Dumb Cunt In Colorado
"Hmmm... The Coffee Taste Salty To You?"
A Family That Smokes Together...
Some Items From The Atlanta Police Blotter
Tupperware: Good For Keeping Your Severed Balls Fresh, Too!
Boy Urinates On Post Office Floor... Priority Mail THAT!
Yet Another Example Of Stupid Fucking Parents and Youth Sports
No Value? I Could Eat Two Girls At Once!
Stupid Criminals, Volume MCMXLII
And The "Teacher Of The Year" Awards Nominees Keep On Coming
"The Flat I Live In Is A Toilet!"
Florida: Grooming Stupid Voters Of Tomorrow, Today
Teacher Arrested For Giving Coke To Students
Trapped In A Bar... Sounds Like Heaven
Prisoner Escapes Through Same Hole 11 Years Later
Pet Hippo Seized In California
She Didn't Do Anything That Every Woman Does, She Just Did It All At Once
Man Gives Judge $151 Million Bill For Saying His Name
Man Shoots Himself In The Balls
Where NOT To Hide Your Cocaine
The U.S. Government: Bad Pot Dealer
They REALLY Take The World Cup Seriously
Wow, I Didn't Know Parking Was So Bad In Tokyo
Taking Your Job WAY Too Seriously
Where Were These Teachers When I Was In High School?
"Mother Of The Year" Nominees Continue To Pour In
Man With Suspended License Hits The Judge Hearing His Case On The Way To Court... Irony At Its Best
The Military Called - They Want A Chemical Analysis Of My Gas
Cycling Bank Robber ID'ed By His Bicycle
Mr. Potatohead License Plate - Yes, I'm Serious
Front-Runners For "Parents Of The Year"
Another Nominee For "Dad Of The Year"
Guard Assaults Female Inmate, Gives Her Pot
Kid Turns Dad In For Growing Pot? What The FUCK Is This World Coming To?
Lincoln Tree Not The Lincoln Tree
Too Bad My Ex-Wife Didn't Have This Nurse
The "David Koresh Lifetime Achievement Award" Goes To...
Sad Fact: In 10 Years, The Toy Will Be Worth More Than The Car
Kid Shows Up In Court For Drug Hearing With Drugs
After This, He Was Offered A Job As An Airport Security Guard
Woman Has Computer Stolen To Stop Boyfriend From Jerkin' It
Lesson One: Don't Rob The Bank You Go To... They Might Recognize Your Voice
PlayStation Offered As Payment For Hit On Aunt
Female Rapist Ordered To Pose Nude
Another Nominee For "Mommy Of The Year"
If I Were A High School Vice Principal...
Um... fuckin' OUCH! That's My BALLS!
Cops And Robbers Gets Kid Suspended... It's No Longer Fun To Be Five Years Old
One More Reason To Hate Frat Boys
Who Do I Have To Fuck To Get Benefits At Work?
Alzheimer's Patient Lives With Dead Husband
Dead Guy's Ashes Held For Ransom
Another Nominee For "Mother Of The Year"
Skyfuckers Hijack Plane, Crash
Man Killed Over Paper Airplane
Another Crime In The Name Of God
Whiny Connecticut Fucks Want To Stop Ice Cream Truck Music
7Up Commercials Draw Fire... Like This Is REALLY Important
Not That I Have A Problem With The Diet... But Shitty DOMINO'S Pizza?
Two Reasons To Never Eat Asian Food. Well, At Least In Asia.
Welcome To Another Edition Of "Why I Hate Arizona"
After His Sentencing, He Was Offered A Position In The Catholic Church
The Worst Spot To Pick For Car Sex
Inmate Uses Toothpaste To Escape
From The Country That Brought You Dirty Panties Vending Machines...
One More Reason To Love Those In The Service Of Religion
How You Shouldn't Go To Your DWI Court Hearing
The "Dirk Diggler" Award For Best New Actress In An Adult Film About Female Golfers Goes To...
Well Shit, Millions Of People Watched "Survivor" - How Bad Could THIS Be?
The Weirdest Pool Cleaning Supplies I Have Ever Heard Of
The "Homemaker Of The Year" Award
And The "Mother Of The Year Award" Goes To...
Why Is It The Stupidest People In The World Seem To All Be In Arizona?
Palo Alto's Homeless Murder Trial: Killer Deodorant
Revenge On Telemarketers: Or, How To Handle Your Next One
Wanted: Knife-Thrower's Assistant
Liability Insurance Laws Gone Amok
Well Yeah, I Don't Like Macs Either, But Evil? Isn't That Going Too Far?
Kidnapping Truck Driver Foiled By Bathroom Message
Even Death Won't Stop You From Getting Ticketed
"The News Of My Death Has Been Greatly Exaggerated"
One More Reason I'm SO Proud To Live In Arizona
Well, That's It. The Vacation To Malaysia Is OFF
"Mom, I'm Switching My Major To Blackjack"
Man Loses Wife, Blames Airline
Maybe Yahoo! Can Settle With Stock Options...
The Reason I NEVER Light Booze On Fire When I'm Working
When Will You People Learn To Stop Videotaping Your Crimes?
Bank Robber and Bad Handwriting
Fat Pig Sues For Not Losing Weight
Skunk Aids in Catching Criminal
Moron Teacher of The Year Award
Woman, husband die in mototcycle accidents
Utah Governor's Son Arrested in Fight Club
Whacko Thought He Was Killing Nazis
The Drunkest Man in the History of Scotland
Drug Tunnel Found in Arizona... AGAIN
Give Me Booze Or Give Me Death