SITE MAP - www.drunkbastard.net

		Hint - you got here from there (I'm assuming, unless you linked here somehow from Google, God bless the Googlebot spider, in which case you can get to the index HERE, and navigate from there). If I change anything I post it here.


		Actually run by CafePress. If I knew how to silkscreen, I'd do it myself. I don't. I don't have the room to do it. And I'm a lazy fuck.

		What some people use as a reason for finding a razor and drawing a hot bath, or at least going on a bender that costs them their life savings, I instead make fun of and tell the world. It's therapy, internet-style.

		Because my second hobby is abusing stupid people until they cry.

		There are now over 240 bars from nineteen countries submitted by people just like you. So, get on the ball and send one in.

		Vote for the best bartender in the great 50 states.

		What Would Kenny Do? Only one way to find out. Ask.

		Find new drinks. Send in your favorites.

		Everybody has a sure-fire remedy, right? I tested a few and posted a bunch right here. A few actually seem to work, go figure.

		For a while I thought it would be cool to put up quirky little news articles that, unlike the face of Jesus in a bowl of Minestrone on the cover of The Weekly World News, actually were in reputable newspapers. Unfortunately, the Bizarre turned into the Sick and Twisted, and I stopped.

		You wanted it back, it's back. Three girls of questionable do-ability, you tell everyone how much you'd have to be paid to fuck 'em. Simple game. You filthdog.

		Make your next get-together a real good drunk.

		The predecessor to "My Life." Some good bitchings, some not-so-poignant, some just drunk stupidity.

		Very hot and scantily-clad women, because, well, I like girls. And, judging by my web traffic, so do a lot of you.

		A cornucopia of files, a treasure trove of funny: The Bo Dictionary: What happens when you mix a guy named Bo and a lake full of Jack Daniel's Old No. 7? You get this. In Defense of Drinking: Quotes from Winston Churchill, W.C. Fields, Ernest Hemingway, Oscar Wilde, et. al. Drunk Humor: Jokes revolving around drunks. Hey bin Laden: A little Mickey Mouse reaction to that cocksucker. Booze-Free Humor: Jokes NOT revolving around drunks. Normisms: Some of the best lines from the "Cheers" barfly, Norm Peterson. Pictures: Photos of stupid shit, funny shit, and stupid-funny shit. Cartoons: The same as the last, but drawn by people. The Mentally Ill Résumé: No shit, a real-life résumé handed to me by a real-life nutcase. Shit this good can't be made up. Rules Of The Drunk Bastard: Read it, learn it, live it.

		Pictures, many from me, many from others like you, of people just like you. Drunk.

		Is it gay to watch your girlfriend fuck another guy? Is it gay to let a dog lick peanut butter off your balls? Real people have asked (I swear to God), and I've laid down the law.

		Whenever someone sent me a video clip or a sound bite, I used to save it in a folder called "Weird Shit." So, I made a page for it, considering I had a vast amount of unused disk space. And I called the page "Weird Shit." How poetic.

		It was suggested, pondered, debated, put off, and now finally put into action. You, too, can be a card-carrying Drunk Bastard! For a measley buck or so, whatcha got to lose?

		Self-explanatory, eh?

		Leave a note for the world telling them what you think. Maybe someone will even care.

		I was trying (unsuccessfully, I might add) to garner some sort of revenue for this site by applying to get pop-under ads. Well, one company said I had to have a posted privacy policy. So I wrote this. They denied my application. Fuck 'em. The Privacy Policy stayed.

		Basically says that if you don't like what you see, go screw yourself. Or start your own website.

		The genesis of this site. If you're REALLY BORED, go ahead and read it.

		Why you should send me money. Lots. And LOTS.